Warning: Dont read if you are in a good mood!

Ok. Enough’s enough.

I counted 7 – SEVEN – cars that cut me off this morning. And then I stopped counting because I was afraid my blood pressure was at the level of a 400 lb. 65 year old man. And I cant be having that. But what I want to say is: Cool. Cut me off if you have every intention of driving like an asshole and going at least 5 MPH over the speed limit. Then, we’ll be assholes together, riding along, late to work, per usual – and you can be my cop shield. HOWEVER if you cut me off and proceed to go 5 miles UNDER the speed limit, sipping your D&D coffee and smoking butts that you throw out of the window, I reserve the right to RIDE YOUR ASS and pass you at the next opportunity whilst driving by you, cursing you for all your shitbox carbon polluting driving self is worth.

Phew. Moving on…

I don’t know whats up with me this week but I’m over it. I’m FUCKING over it. I think visiting Maryland showed me a little taste of something awesome. A city by the water, where I could be near my sister, though at times she may drive me a little insane (ie standing outside the bathroom door @ 1am when I wake up to pee “just to see what I’m doing & if I’m awake too”), designer clothes at every corner, hot men in navy whites, beautiful homes, complete freedom from responsibility. But what I really came home with was a big old bag of emotional luggage. Because no one tells you how it is quite like your sister. And 99.9% of the time she is entirely correct.

So here I am. Back home with a big open wound from all the soul searching in Southwest terminal B and no where to put it all. So I just basically keep on keeping on whilst this chip on my shoulder grows to the size of Kansas. Waiting for the phone call I need from BFF to set me straight.

Last night during class, we were all to give our final presentations. There was a random girl (not in our class ever before) selling Mary Kay in the front row (I kid you not). A Japanese foreign exchange student snapping pics of people during their presentations on his cell phone. People getting up and leaving only to come back with their own presentations half finished, talking amongst their group members about changes in their slides. People getting and TAKING phone calls.

One girl actually turned around and said to me – WHAT IS GOING ON RIGHT NOW?!!! She looked dazed and confused. Another boy, during his presentation, said right in the middle of it – Wait. Sorry. I’m distracted by the PICTURE TAKING! I laughed out loud upon hearing that and probably distracted him even more. I told my partner that if he took pics while I was up there, I was going to throw the cell phone across the room. However, I didn’t have to because the group ahead of us announced that because she didn’t sign a photo release form, her picture was not to be taken.

These are graduate students, people. GRADUATE STUDENTS.

I cant even take it. I know (from BFF) there is this old saying that if everyone around you is an ASSHOLE, take a deep look inside and perhaps you will find that YOU are indeed the asshole and you need to change your attitude. However. I reserve the right to revoke that at this moment because I cant be the only person who has noticed that the collective IQ of people around me is considerably lower than ever before. PEOPLE ARE DUMB.

Is it computers? Technology?

Something is making people stupid and it aint the water.

Look. Whatever. I sound like a bitch right now and that’s ok. I deserve the opportunity to bitch. I haven’t in a long ass time.

So I will just proceed on to my laundry list of complaints:

• I have about 4 weeks of laundry to do in one night.
• It has rained for a month straight. All the water and wetness and lack of sun has ruined my garden.
• The lawnmower is broken so my mom’s lawn is up to my knees and with wet grass, you can imagine my sincere AGGRAVATION walking to and from my car each morning.
• M and I have fought every night since I got back from MD and I broke up with him over dirty sheets. “WTF. You cant do the laundry while I’m gone so I can come home to clean sheets?!?!?! That’s it. We’re breaking up.”
• I have had PAID reservations since June to go camping this wkd and its going to rain both Fri & Sat.
• Interest rates are up to 6.8%.
• The Olympics are too confusing. I have no idea what is on when and how, is it live? Is this what I read about online already and therefore, I don’t need to watch? WHAT IS GOING ON PEOPLE?
• Today I had to take a Tylenol because my jaw hurt. WTF.
• Students are coming back which means never being able to pee when you need to and having to make awkward conversations in the kitchen when all you want is boiled water for your morning tea before you fucking go on a rampage.

Seriously.

Now who wants to hang out?

PS: Janette: Can you come out to my work and give me a private yoga session this week? Ha ha. I hope you blog soon about the house. Cant wait to hear more about it.