More important things to do...

I have a list of things to do that is kinda making me want to jump ship and go back to a simpler time, before all the renovating.

1. Price rugs at Rotmans and Home Depot. This includes 14 x 14 size plush 4 star wall to wall carpeting and installation.
2. Finish up missed spots on wall from first painting. I've decided not to do a second coat b/c I'm over it and its white so it doesnt matter anyway. And I did primer first.
3. Rip up the old rug and matting from the floor and bring to the dump for bulk day tomorrow.
4. Dismantle bureau, desk, entertainment center and old twin bed for moving (into where? I have no idea) so they can hang out while ripping up said rug and until new rug can be installed.
5. Bring my old mattress to the dump. Replace with new bed.
6. Replace wood molding.
7. Set appt time for new rug installation and hope that I dont have to take a day off to do that.
8. Set fire to my bank account because it's going down in a blaze of glory whether I like it or not.

Also, the new manager at my work has announced she is leaving - after starting in April. After the world's longest employee search set up by yours truly. And everyone is running around like, What will (boss) offer her to stay?

Excuse me... but I'll be the first to admit its a big loss to lose this lady. She makes me laugh and she's my friend. BUT.

Who the fuck is she to threaten to leave and GET STUFF OFFERED TO HER? I'm sorry. But if I'm mistaken, I've been here almost a year with NO COMPLAINING, no real hazards, no aches and pains... and what do I get for that? Can I have some stuff offered to me? LIKE FOR INSTANCE A RAISE?

Whatever.

I hate that the squeaky wheels always get the grease. Just cuz they SUCK ASS. Sometimes instead of the grease, maybe, they should just be REPLACED.

If you're watching The Wonder Years with me, then you will note that the last 2 episodes have been heart wrenching. The ones when Winnie gets to go on a field trip with them even though she moved to the next town over and she breaks Kevin's heart. Well last night he tried to get her back and failed and Kevin cries to his dad about it. And I went to bed thinking... is that what Dads do? Comfort you when you break up with your boyfriend/girlfriend? I had no idea.

I also think this time in my life is when I'm kind of missing having a dad. Especially when renovating and things like drills comes into play. Even my mom said she wanted to come with me to price rugs because she didnt want them to take advantage of me. Now, I negotiated the deal of a lifetime for my Jeep against all odds and I did cry the entire way home afterwards because I felt so overwhelmed and helpless against a male chauvinist pig, but its one of those things. Ladies, just admit it. Sometimes you need a man for things. And its sad because not everyone has one available. Even if I had an uncle to help... just little things like bringing the mattress to the dump. I need a truck. Men usually have trucks. I'm grateful for my brother, but he doesnt really have time to help. And my brother in law lives 2+ hours away.

I also thought about if I had to buy a crappy home and renovate it or buy land and clear it and build my own home in order to afford one... how do you do that without a dad or father figure of some kind to talk you through it? How does one go about finding a contractor that wont fuck you over because you're a single woman? Really.

Think about that.

It makes me feel proud to accomplish everything that I have on my own but let's be honest. There is a lot of work to be done in the world as far as treating women equally. And even then, I've said myself that I just want to be taken care of... and I know secretly, deep down, even the most independent woman needs a man to take out the trash, hammer in a nail, and assemble stuff. Its just the way of the world. Accept it.

Its really all too exhausting to think about.