Choice

Ok here’s the latest. BFF is on her plane to Alaska and I’m pretty excited for her. She’s going to do great things up there so let’s all wish her a safe and happy trip – and an ugly, smelly passenger next to her for the entire flight.

Anyways, now that that’s out of the way, let’s discuss the Sex and the City movie. It’s quite the ambivalent movie, am I right? You don’t really feel one way or the other about the choices these women make. Its compelling and awesome and I laughed and I cried – a lot. (don’t read this paragraph if you don’t want to be spoiled) But I mean, Big… sorry, John, leaves her at the alter and in the end she marries him anyway? I have to say, that is a big risk. But we all do that every day, right? I mean, we bitch and moan about people in our lives, but for the most part, they stay there for the next time we want to rip them to shreds. Because the point is that you make a choice – a commitment. And you stick with it. If you have integrity and it’s just that important to you, you find a way to make it work. I mean, look, Miranda’s choice to take Steve back… that’s a tough call. I have to say that if M did that to me, I couldn’t take him back. I just couldn’t look him in the face ever again. That’s a real betrayal there. But it’s a choice you make. And you move on… and I guess you never really know what you’d do until you got there.

So I guess this is what I’ve decided about life… You know how you sometimes wonder: Am I doing the right thing? Is he the right man? Should I leave? Stay? Should I take this new job offer? Risk losing something important to me? These questions that you grapple with in certain times in your life… Arent they just a choice you make and then you live the consequence? And you cant really go back and judge it or say: Well, shouldn’t have done that! Because the truth is that there was no right or wrong… just a choice and the corresponding moral ambivalence.

I don’t know. I’m brain-drained today. And I’ve discovered the disturbia of that show on A&E called Intervention. Holy hell that shit is uncomfortable to watch. I mean, drugs in general, scare the living shit out of me. Never been around them (that I know of) and never done them (very sure of that) and for some reason, they just make me feel as if my skin is crawling. To watch someone on camera go through that. Well, it makes me sick, yet I watch it. It’s great TV though to see them complete treatment and hope it’s a happy ending.

For instance, last nite I watched one on this girl my age who was addicted to computer duster inhalant. You know that can that you spray on your computer to get the crumbs out and it’s freezing cold afterwards… Yea. Hi. Sucking on that all day every day for like years… How did this girl not die? I don’t know. In fact, I didn’t even know that was a problem people had. Who comes up with this stuff? Seriously.

Also, BFF and I are thinking about quitting Myspace in 2 days. My only problem is that there are people on there that if I suddenly needed to get in touch with them, I wouldn’t be able to if I didn’t have a Myspace. So that’s a conundrum there of great proportions. Again, a choice to be made. Albeit a dumb one, but still. They are everywhere.

I’m off to eat dinner then class. Public policy is mind numbing.