I did my time sheet this morning. HI! 16 hours of work. LUVS IT.
I also loved that Britney Spears interview last night on Dateline with Matt Lauer. Seriously, homegirl needs a comb and a washcloth. I could fix her up. Girl has millions of dollars at her fingertips and she wears a see through shirt and denim mini with her bra hanging out on national televsion while 6-7 months pregnant! This is just crazy. Shit is berzerk! Try to ask people to respect you and you come out swinging like that--with clumpy mascara and caked on eyeshadow, chomping some bubblegum? Oh, man. You gotta feel bad for her... paparazzi and shit... but you aint got to have much sympathy for that styling she has going on. She kicks her own image down the tubes on the regular. And she should just pack it in and go move to Bahrain with Whacko Jacko.
I have tons of work to do today, which is in parts good because it will make the day fly by and parts BAD because I have no motivation to do it. Really. Is this bad to admit? I kinda liked being drugged up at work. Today I'm sober as a goat and I'll tell ya: Not so fun.
Last night I was woken up by M who had gone to the bar to meet his bro "for one beer" at 3:30am. SHIT WAS OFF THE CHAIN. 3:30am and he is in the bathroom rubbing calamine lotion all over his stomach. I can smell alcohol on his breath. He appears to be wide awake. M, what is going on right now? Did you just get home? Nah, I was eating a sANWICH and I fell SLEEP on tha couch. Oh really?
You know when you are so pissed that it actually wakes you up out of a dead sleep so much so that you think you might as well just wake up now because if you go back to sleep, when the real time comes to wake up, you will be 4,000 times more sleepy? Yea, that's kinda how I felt when he told me he had been home but was just sleeping on the couch... So I got up and went back to the bedroom and said, plainly: SO STAY THERE! and slammed the door and locked it.
I dont know what's come over me. I'm like some crazy lunatic girlfriend who is coming up with shit to be pissed about for no reason. And it doesnt help that the night before last, some young girl called his cell phone from a PRIVATE number and was like, hey... and M was like, hey... who's this? And she goes, giggly... Oh, I have the wrong number? And he's like, um, who are you looking for? And she goes, Ummm... Ja---im. Jim! M was like, wrong number... And that was it. Totally innocent. But then I in turn get all girl crazy and start to be like, oh really... WTF. Who was that? And go through a million scenarios and it doesnt help that the next night for all intensive purposes, he is out until 3:30am without me. UM HI.
The thing is, I know its my stuff... it's totally that I expect men to disappoint. Men do that. On the regular. And what makes me think it wont happen to me? Can you trust that? Can you really, honestly trust that your life will be as you imagine it to be in 5 years? 10? 6 weeks? I dont know. Shit changes like the wind. And men change and some men dont even change at all. I dont know. Somedays, I just want to throw it all out and start fresh. Just being ok with yourself is the greatest gift. And to be honest, I havent quite made it there yet. I'm always had a boy interest... maybe not a boyfriend, but a guy that I'm thinking about. Now that I have a real live in boyfriend and a real planned future together, it's like all the more solid. When you're alone, its nebulous. You can be with yourself, with any guy, whatever. Free. When you are with someone, it can clamp down on your perceptions, I guess. And shit aint good. When it gets like that, get out and get some fresh air.
Oh, and one more thing... when you do live with a man, realize that your apartment or house is going to look like shit. I cant tell you how upsetting it is to come home and have 47 pairs of Nikes by the door and everything either hanging up in closets or in laundry baskets all over the bedroom or in piles on TOP of the bureaus while nothing is put away, folded INSIDE the bureaus... There is always going to be dirty tissues with god knows what on them in the basket next to the toilet. There will be dishes in the SINK even though you clearly have a WORKING DISHWASHER. There will be piles of video game cases and open CD cases around the living room instead of in the entertainment center you bought specifically for housing said cases. And if you happen to live with the worlds most inept handyman, you will have a broken bathroom door and 27 thousand different tools, nails, screws, etc. just chillin around the kitchen table. You will also, if you are REALLY lucky, have a mountain bike in your dining room.
Or maybe, that's just me.
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2 comments:
Few things:
1.) I'm sorry. I hate to be the bearer of bad news. But that interview tapped the last nail into the coffin that contains Britney's career. No more. She's done. We'll see her on the Surreal Life in 4, 5.
2.) You're not being a bitch gf. If you didn't react that way, I'd be like bitch please.
3.) There is presently a laundry basket FULL OF clean laundry from LAST FRIDAY sitting in front of Rob's closet. Where has he been putting his dirty laundry? Oh, throwing it on the closet floor. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THEIR BRAINS.
So, about the whole, "Living with a boy" thing:
1) First of all, back in the day when I lived with a boy, I threw my shit all over the place. My ex didn't have much organized in his real life, but his bedroom was clean as soon as I vacated myself and my 30 pairs of shoes.
2)Britney will always be my hero. Even when she starts naming her children Dwayne and Krystalle to show how white trash she really is.
3)Ummm, if my boyfriend was out till 3:30 am without me and then....wait, I think you saw him at the bar at like an ungodly hour without me. However, as far as I know, he has not had giggly females calling him. But it is not as though I would know if he did. Then again, my boyfriend is the type who would just say, "Bitch, I am sick of you and your bitchin', I am gettin' me a new whore, yo."
(Well, maybe not in so many words. But you get my drift. That is what makes him so endearing.)
I think you need to kick some serious ass out the DOOR if it happens again. You don't need that.
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